Eeeeemmmmpppptyyyyyy.....

Hey guys,

I'm on my lunch break right now, at the library at school. The internet is really fast, and combined with my quick typing skills, I check my e-mail and get everything done in mere minutes and end up not really having anything else to do. I thought I'd give an update on how things are going.

Hope you got home alright, Chels! How was the bus ride?

Ann, you're still up for hanging out with Denise tomorrow, right? I believe we're meeting at 2:00am at Orange Corner in Kerrisdale (hopefully you know where that is, since you sort of live in Kerrisdale).

Lily, how's the sports day planning going? I'm still up if you are!

Yeah, so things haven't been going so well between me and my Dan. Remember how I have the house to myself for about a week and I invited him to stay over a few nights? I don't think that's gonna happen now.

Long story short, I was talking to him on MSN, telling him about this dream I had about him where he came in my house and started making out with me. And he said (on MSN, not in my dream) "Why am I the initiator?" to which I replied, "Oh, maybe it means something... that you should be or something". And he told me, "I don't want to be the initiator. I don't want to lead you on."

And after that he signed off and we had to continue our conversation via texts. Although we never said we were going anywhere in our relationship other than being friends, I guess I had hoped that we might. Even a small chance was better than nothing, right? Anyway, he reiterated how "We're just friends. What did you think?" which didn't get me as upset as I thought I would be, but it was mainly because we've made out a couple times and at least for me, you don't make out with friends.

So now things are kind of awkward between us, and he hasn't said anything about staying over again. I know he had a midterm yesterday but now... I dunno. I hate this awkwardness and it's mainly me that's awkward but I feel like I can't look at him the same way (obviously) and I have to adjust to only being friends. Sigh...

All this combined with the fact that this week was supposed to be great for me has really pulled me down. When I come home, I'm alone and at first, I thought it wasn't a big deal, since I'm alone a lot anyway, but now I really feel the loneliness now. Even when my mom and sister were at home, I didn't really talk to them all that much but knowing that they were there was comforting in a way that I sort of took for granted. I ended up texting Kem and asking him if he could just talk with me for a bit or even come by for a little while and to my surprise, he actually responded and said he'd see if had any time this week to see me. I really hope I do get to see him but based on experience, I wouldn't be surprised if he didn't show (is that bad of me?)

Oh, and I got tested on Tuesday, which was actually not that bad, especially the part where they poke your arm for blood. I was really, really apprehensive about that, but it was really just a prick. Plus, I didn't look at the actual poking, so as not to be freaked out that there was a thing in my arm. Anyway, it takes about 3 - 4 days and the nurse told me to check-in on Friday to see if they've come in.

Gotta go to my geo lab now. Ugh, math...



Aaron